poetry

Red-naped Sapsuckers, Early July

This is in response to a prompt from Radha Marcum’s workshop Write Your Life in Poetry offered by the Boulder Public Library.

Red-naped Sapsuckers, Early July

you can’t help but hear them
the insatiable insistent peeping
hungry beaks open and shut
almost as fast as hummingbird wings
inside a perfectly round O
perforating smooth beige aspen bark

with binoculars you can peek inside
and after a few seconds of dark blank staring
a small striped head and desperate beak
pop up into view
like the start of a puppet show

now and then she collapses
then eventually works her way
eye-level with her window on the world again
her pleas the same tempo and volume
wherever she is

the dogged parents fly in and out
red crests and napes brilliant
against backlit aspen emerald green
on approach they issue a rough nasal call
swoop in, load the mouths
take a deep breath
look out toward their next dead tree to loot
then fly off with great up-and-down flap-glides

it gets easier
I want to tell them
you should talk to the hairy woodpeckers
just up the road
their handsome son just joined them
out in the trees
and he calmly plink-calls them
now and then while they hunt together
and enjoy each other’s company
while sometimes just listening
to the quiet ruffle of wind
through needles and feathers

but the ragged sapsuckers don’t have time
to even listen to our encouragement –
the little mouths never stop begging
and the hole is never filled

poetry

endless knot

endless knot

one year after his death
not much new has come to light
except a few photos
including one of my mother and him
tender, both in Irish sweaters,
as if it were all meant to be
as if things once fit
even as if one might trace
the complicated thread uniting
all our lives
follow along its convoluted loops
and one day see the whole thing
through the distance of time
to find an intricate Celtic knot
then believe/understand that it was all
part of the plan
that sculpted the landscape of now
tugged us into the beings we’ll be
wove us into shapes
that will someday make us able
to give what’s needed
without worrying why

poetry

Ode to Saying No

Ode to Saying No

such a small thing
two letters
barely more than I or U

the zigzag lightning of the N
nailing down a boundary
carving some blank space
a soul could dream in

the O
a holy roundness of awe
and indrawn breath
a bullseye of spaciousness
a hula hoop escape tunnel
one could slip right through

together they rope off
a bit of possibility
a place to be only that which
one actively wishes
a forcefield of intentional energy
sizzling with power

poetry

Ode to 2 AM

Ode to 2 AM

to the computer battery, giving up the ghost
the screen going blank
whirring fan going silent

to the dry pen barrel
nothing left to give

to my heavy lids
and slumped torso
fighting off inevitable sleep

to the freezer icemaker
rattling me awake

to the steady ticks
of the analog clock
marking the dark seconds
until light breaks

to the silent sleeping souls
whose cacophony makes
the swirling days splendid
and whose blessed nighttime stillness
allows thoughts to form
and expand like clouds
blowing up over the plains
adrift heavy with the promise of rain
that might soak and satisfy
the columbines
bowed by the house’s heat

to the locked doors
keeping the bears at bay

to the chocolate and wine
whispering in the cupboard
and the warm bed
countering their call

to the fuzzy blanket
tucking me in
in my half-asleep state
agreeable for examining
the dreamy subconscious

to the paper obediently absorbing
graphite, ink, ideas, my self

to those who will
put up with me tomorrow
and those who cluck their tongues
at my questionable habits
my inability to do
what’s right and reasonable

to the quiet stars straining
to put all this and more
into expanded perspective

to the sofa’s creak
when I finally tear myself away

to all these
I insincerely promise
I will do better tomorrow
(goodnight)

poetry

eclipse on a night with no moon

eclipse on a night with no moon

we scaled the peak to watch her rise
but found a bank of clouds
draped over the eastern foothills

chilled and sleepy
we descended home
sure we would see her on the way
but the sky stayed a blank pink
then blue then grey
marked by a star a moth a bat

we lit our sparklers instead
scrawled our hopes across
night’s blank page
signed ephemeral pledges in smoke
still she didn’t wink at us

after the boys surrendered to sleep
I set a timer to check on her
but the clouds had swung round to the south
and the only evidence that she was up
was the thin silver tracery
around each small cloud

maybe some nights
she doesn’t want to be seen
just wants to hide in her own corner of sky
and be nothing to nobody
just reflect on her time warmed by Sol’s rays
dream her own quiet icicle-mint dreams
not worry about those worrying about her
just slip away in the dark
no matter who might be wistfully watching

poetry

return to South Sudan

return to South Sudan

before returning to his village
he found a bookstore
and bought a big pile of books
for twenty bucks

but when he brought them out
the line stretched
all the way to disappointment

determined to turn no one away
he did the only thinkable thing –
sliced each paperback in half

as the mothers collected
these split works
they cried with thanks

for the little boy they never thought
would walk back into their lives
and the faraway stories of hope
he brought in his own hands

poetry

fireweed phenology

fireweed phenology

I don’t know
how two long ladders
of fireweed blossoms
could open all at once

I’m not sure
which is more alarming –
all that unfolding
in a single day

or the chance that yesterday
I failed to notice
the buds’ seams had begun to split
spilling all that fuchsia
into July sun

poetry

touch-up painting

touch-up painting

it’s so easy
to let the years go by
without registering
the little scuffs and dings
the chinks in the smooth clean surfaces
carelessness’s scars

it doesn’t take long
to bring attention and a clean brush
to see and smooth the rough patches
to touch the scarred bits with
soft gentle strokes
until the wall glows whole again
and we know the joy
of putting things right

poetry

homecoming

homecoming

our house surrendered
we resume possession
of our regular lives
still irregular
as our neighbors friends family
stand at a distance
out on the sidewalk
masked and awkward
but it is still something
to see their bodies
through our open door
still comforting
to breathe our old house’s
singular smell –
antique timber, dust, sunshine, memory
as the day drifts down
the house welcomes us
in its own way
casting rainbows on the wall
from stained glass prisms
granting us a place to be at ease
at home again

poetry

nests revealed

nests revealed

while waiting patiently
for the hairy woodpecker mother
to bring the very large flying bug
to her babies
two more nests reveal themselves:
a flicker flies straight to an aspen
where a branch becomes a hole
and while watching him
a mountain chickadee is
swallowed by trunk

when we’re silent and still
not rushing
the world brings us into
her inner circle