poetry

my son has no taste for paintball

my son has no taste for paintball

My son sheds his year-round shorts and short-sleeved tee
for long pants and long sleeves,
what he’s been told to wear
to lessen the sting of inevitable impacts.
Hood up, he looks the stereotypical hoodlum,
even further from his usual self.

At the end of the party my teacher husband texts
we’re never hosting something like this.
I picture the boys covered in paint,
ask if his sneakers are ruined.
No, they’re fine
he writes
but it’s a bunch of kids
in full military tactical gear
shooting at each other.

too real
too raw

He comes home
all in one piece on the outside;
inside, rattled, by more than
the way the bullets grazed skulls,
more than the sinking feeling
of pulling a trigger for the very first time.

These boys already know too much real life –
all the losses that can’t be laughed at,
the way things get so serious so fast:
fire, flood, shooting, plague.

Good times are too hard to come by
to be squandered on
taking each other out.

poetry

archives to ashes

Photo courtesy The Daily Camera.

archives to ashes

what happens when the museum burns down –
the space that’s supposed to hold your history
the archives and artifacts
the record of your past?

we know this happens –
the county courthouse burned down
taking its deeds to the grave
leaving us unsure of our own house’s age

the Library of Congress burned
not once but twice
leaving Thomas Jefferson to reseed it
with his own books

but for these little western mining towns
what burns with the history museum?
photographs, yearbooks, maps and bits of settler life
mine scrip and speakeasy keepsakes

our memories are so faulty
without bits of concrete evidence
it’s too easy to have license
to create a new past

poetry

miracle

miracle

my mother sits with me
at my table
making plans
a year away

every bit of this scene
a miracle
I wouldn’t dare dream
one year ago

poetry

the cautious committee

the cautious committee

the committee commits to take no action that might possibly be construed as offensive
the committee thus takes no action
except to endlessly examine whether a potential action has the potential to offend
the committee does not trust anyone’s judgment as to what might be offensive
(including its own)
so it will strip all warm, individual messages
of their warmth and individuality
before sending the sanitized versions
out into the world
where they will register with the cold neutral resonance
of a clean computer-generated auto-response

the committee respectfully requests that it be forgiven
for not engaging in the potentially perilous act
of accepting the crushing responsibility
of humbly requesting forgiveness

Uncategorized

CD2 Assembly

Photo by Hart Van Denburg, CPR News.

CD2 Assembly

hundreds of us Zoom in
to send Joe back to Washington

there’s no one else we want
we just must jump through hoops
to check the boxes
to make it so

I explain to Cedar
I’m taking dinner in the guest room
because I’m saving democracy
(I’m not, but Joe may)

the morning after the fire
Polis, Neguse, Bennet
grim in the chopper
yet still reassuring –
citizen leaders who understand warming
have a healthy fear of climate change
and aren’t afraid to make good trouble

we’ll send them back into the firefight
at least one more round

poetry

Mariah Leach’s Defiant Daffodils

Photo by Mariah Zebrowski Leach.

Mariah Leach’s Defiant Daffodils

They were such a steady sign of spring
and, more than that,
of hope and the extravagant beauty
the cold ground could hold
that they captivated her gaze
year after year,
and she couldn’t help but see them
and celebrate their joyful presence
with at least one quick photo.
Looking back now
a parade of children joined them
also beckoned by the intense gold
when sun lit petal cells until they glowed.

Now they’ve pushed through
the burned crust of what was,
the tips of their long green leaves
yellowed by flame, singed
but still singing their spring song.
They refuse not to witness,
to not assert joy in a scene
where despair is easy to give way to.

This is what we do:
we press on and up
pushing aside impervious barriers
finding the sun through the intense dark cold.
We stand defiant among the wreckage.
We simply do what we’ve been made to do.
We grow. We shine.

poetry

germinating

germinating

Today the sunflower seeds have split.
They sit like toques on tall green crowns,
leaves not yet spread
but muscled up from the soil
after the kiss of drenched earth
swelled them to bursting,
sent them twisting upward
toward the slow fire of sunlight.
Now their subterranean selves
are held in midair,
incontrovertible evidence that buried potential
may emerge into the light.

My son, fourteen, has sowed plenty of other seeds,
but is still stirred to see so plainly
the black-and-white striped husks
perched atop the sprung green.

Now the cells of these new sprouts
should keep splitting until they, too,
bear golden crowns surrounding
the next generation of smooth striped packets of hope
ready to be pushed into the waiting earth,
ready to split and rocket into light after only
a week’s worth of sunrises and sets.

My son sits paused at the end of boyhood
waiting for the silent prompt that sends
his own cells doubling, his blonde crown
also stretching to sun. He waits, and takes on faith
that like the simple black seeds,
his body houses the knowledge needed
to transform and grow,
to shed one phase for the next,
to thrive in the light.

poetry

first cleared lot seen

first cleared lot seen

driving home from the vet today
not thinking of anything
the flat beige lot hits me
like a frying pan across the forehead:
the first cleared lot I’ve seen,
ready to plant a new life on
like the bright green grass
now painting the black hills
with unexpected hope,
its strong roots dug into
the same tough earth,
ready to reach toward the light
tomorrow

poetry

Vote No on Redtail Ridge

Vote No on Redtail Ridge

money is energy
two people tell me this week
it feels like magic

there’s dark magic and white magic
people told me in Ireland
this feels like dark energy

can I launder it?
push it toward the light?
toward working for good?

Redtail Ridge: hard to know
which side to vote for –
a no vote says yes to what?

but when you follow the money
it’s clear to see:
no is yes to more restraint

yes is no to rethinking what we want next
now that the world has changed:
no is the road to a new map –

let’s draw it

poetry

hearing voices

hearing voices

all day when a question comes
I hear
you know how to do it

not since I was a sassy eight-year-old
have I felt so sure